January: RESOLUTIONS versus goals or Be Like Chris Rock’s Rufus

In 1999 Kevin Smith released the film Dogma. In that film, Chris Rock’s Rufus observed, “It’s better to have an idea. You can change an idea.” Most people give up on resolutions because they are too rigid, too dogmatic. What if you just had an idea? What if you were able to change it as you went?

In the month of new starts and second chances, give yourself permission to be kind to you.  It can be good to write down goals, partly to stay accountable, partly to remember them, partly because it just feels so wonderful to cross out something you accomplished. You can choose to write on paper, or an electronic document. You can choose to do it in the way that makes you feel the best.

How did you talk to yourself when you wrote your goals? Be mindful of how you talk to yourself.  Be kind. Instead of  declaring in red capital bold letters 

I WILL LOSE 10 POUNDS 

you might write, “I can choose to go for a walk three times a week for 15 minutes.”  Giving yourself easy to reach goals gives you two benefits. First, you can enjoy your accomplishment. Second, when you reach the goal so easily, you can choose to add a new goal. 

I like to have an electronic document. I like to highlight in yellow my accomplishments with the date accomplished. I like to add new ones and see if I can mark those off in yellow, too. In the end, you are in charge. You have the power. Please always remember: you are excellent exactly how you are.
You don’t have to do it alone. I am a licensed clinician. Contact me for a free 30 minute consultation. It does not have to stay this way. You deserve to feel heard. You deserve to feel happy. You deserve to feel safe. www.therapyfellows.com choose Individual and Family Therapy and use password Picture1925